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What can I trust?


There are many kinds of trust: trust in yourself, trust in a system like government or the way your work department is run, trust in others, and trust in your personal beliefs or philosophy.  (I’m sure there are more kinds of trust, but that’s all I can think of right now.)  With so many varying types of trust it’s no wonder people have trust issues.  I’m no different.  (There. I said it.  I have trust issues.)

 

Trusting myself can be difficult because I don’t know that my thoughts and/or feelings are always telling me the truth.  Sometimes I’ll make a decision based on how my heart leads me and then later I find out that choice may not have been the healthiest choice.  Other times I’ll decide something straight out of my head only to realize later I was misinformed or less-informed.  Had I been given more information or if I would have taken a step back and thought just a little longer on the matter I might have made a different choice.  This isn’t to say that I’m a serial mistake maker because sometimes I make really great choices, but it is to say that I have a great deal of improvement to make in the area of trusting myself.  How does one know their instincts are correct?  How can one be sure their emotions are accurately aligned to the situation?  How can I be certain I have enough complete and right information to make a choice?  Not knowing the answers to these questions can lead one to distrust themselves and become shackled to anxiety.  The enslavement of anxiety toward decision making can be immobilizing even though a paralytic choice is still a choice.  Most of the time this kind of choice, the choice to make no choice, is the wrong choice that leads to more choices of similar nature.  How, then, can someone stop the cycle of choiceless decisions and begin to trust the heart and head again?

 

Trusting in a system like government or the way my department at work is run can be just as confusing.  I have the great pleasure to work in a department that values the ideas and energy contributed to the team by its members.  I’m not sure our government is run the same way.  Inability to trust our government leads me to rely heavily on my faith in God and how I pattern my life after the things He teaches through the Bible.  I have no guarantee or any sure fire way of knowing this is correct, but I do know the Bible has never failed me nor has the Bible led me down a wrong or destructive path so I’ll keep trusting. 

 

Trusting in others is probably the aspect of trust that most people find most challenging.  How do I know the other person will do what was promised?  How do I KNOW this?  I don’t.  I can’t.  No one does.  No one can.  That’s why it’s called trust. In order to build trust I have to practice a positive and confident expectation that what was promised will be delivered.  Building trust is a two-way street; it’s not just up to the person being trusted.  There has to be a trustor and a trustee.  When the promise goes undelivered trust is broken and must be redeemed, which is harder to do than it would be to fulfill the original promise.  Broken trust seems to act a whole lot like debt.  If I don’t have the cash to buy the item, then I shouldn’t buy it on promise.  If I don’t have the capacity to make a promise, then I shouldn’t pledge myself to something or someone.  Digging out of debt is hard because you have to pay the price you owe PLUS interest.  Broken trust is the same way.  You have to deliver the original promise PLUS extra promises to prove that you really mean to mend the relationship.  Of course there are levels of trust and different people in my life are allotted different measures of trust.  These measures are assigned by me based on the preponderance of evidence proving their integrity and responsibility.  I trust my son (who is almost one) to put everything he finds in his mouth because he is learning and growing every single second.  I trust my nieces and nephews to ask loads of questions because they are learning and growing every single second.  Those are two different levels of trust but equally appropriate to the individual.  If I can parse my expectations and trust in this area of my life why do I struggle in other areas?  It’s the same concept; the same principle.  I think trust in others circles back to being able to trust myself and know that my heart and head are aligned to make good judgments. 

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