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Couch Time with Sonja



Today was another turning point.  I sat with my friends and we talked: openly, candidly, authentically.  We talked in front of cameras. With regard to those I love and will always be connected to, I took a step in the direction of telling my story without discrediting their honor or telling their story, which doesn’t belong to me.  The interview with Sonja and Delia is just a portion, a quick peek into what makes me who I am.  I feel strangely calm.  (Normally, I would be nine breaths into a full blown panic attack looking for a stair rail or door handle to hold until my breathing returned to normal.) What’s funny (maybe more curious than funny) is the most unsettling thing about the whole interview was what to wear, which is not surprising as most women don’t just LOVE the video camera.  (Still shots are one thing, but I can only suck in and hold my neck skinny for so long before it’s time to breathe again.)  For as long as I can remember getting dressed for special events or even getting dressed at all when I was in a dark hole of depression/anxiety/panic for a regular event like family dinner or the grocery store was paralyzing.  This event, my ON CAMERA interview, proved to have the same trigger, but not nearly the same effect.  I can most definitely feel and sense my emotional growth in that no panic attacks ensued, and I was fully and appropriately clothed for the interview.  #win 
Sonja and Delia are friends who accept me where I am, but behind their sparkling smiles and soulful hugs I feel their prayers of challenge for me to press forward into something new, better, God-orchestrated and they don’t even have to say it; I just feel it.  Collectively, she listens with depth and desire to fully understand or at least find a portion of herself that even remotely relates to what I’m sharing.  She seeks and speaks the truth in love, she demonstrates strength while keeping her femininity intact, she loves deeply and wholly, and she celebrates the bravery in others to tell their story with self-love by forgiving freely and building barricades of boundaries to protect their peace and their dream. 
As I live and breathe and cry and fall down and get back up again and write my story of SWEET & STRONG, I am honored to call gentle warriors like Sonja and Delia my friends.  Maybe one day I’ll be a friend like they are to me and perpetuate the movement of authenticity for those around me.

With love,
Kimber.

Airing: 5/26/19 @ 7pm
Watch on FB Live @couchtimewithsonja or on the website couchtimewithsonja.com

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