Moments of Greatness

There have been a few moments of supreme greatness in my adult life.  Sure, I can recount moments of greatness in my childhood and adolescence, but this morning I woke up thinking about the good things that have happened in the last ten years or so.  The moment I graduated with a bachelor’s degree and walked across the stage to receive my diploma was great.  My first day as a teacher when I wanted a second sandwich for lunch because I was so hungry and then went home and instantly fell asleep on my couch instead.  That day was great.  Except the second day when I had to go back and do it all again… that was less great.  (It definitely took a while to figure out a teaching rhythm because… dang… kids are tough…)

Another great moment was January 17, 2009, when Mike told me he was going to marry me.  Earlier that day we had met at his niece’s birthday party on accident, and I was less than thrilled to see him because I knew we were headed for another round of tetherball with Kimber’s heart.  Turned out… I was wrong.  He meant it, and we just celebrated 7 years in March.  I love him.  That was a great day. 

Fast forward to August 17, 2014, I met with a family friend and pastor about my ideas of fasting and what it meant to be “called to fast”.  I had never felt the call before even though I had participated previously, but the word “fast” continued to make itself present in my head.  When I asked her about it she simply explained that if you’re thinking about it this much it must mean you need to fast.  Pretty simple.  Then she prayed for me.  During the prayer she touched my belly and said, “This time next year we will be holding a baby”.  I crumbled.  She had no idea that the previous 13 years I had 4 different doctors tell me it was either highly unlikely, impossible, or dangerous for me to have a baby.  The dangerous part was for the baby because my body showed signs to doctors that I would not be able to carry a baby to full term.  I immediately shared the prayer with my husband and dad in front of our friend so she would see and know just how strongly her words had impacted me.  The next day I started a six week fast of liquids only.  Those six weeks were dozens of moments of greatness all linked together.  I started the fast completely separate from her prayer about a baby.  Honestly, I didn’t know why I was fasting.  I just knew it was something I was supposed to do. 

On November 24, 2014, I went to a Pinterest party where we were making different artsy items with some work friends.  My boss brought a scrapbook paper activity that depicted a baby in a manger with a star.  The words across the top were supposed to be something like “miracles happen”, but I glued the words “a baby changes everything”.  Up until that exact moment I had not uttered the words to myself that I wanted a baby.  It was too scary to want something that big.  The disappointment, the responsibility, the foreverness of a baby was scary to me.  I wasn’t prepared to be that vulnerable.  But… for whatever reason I glued those words, carried the canvas home, and posted it in our kitchen at Grammy’s house right by the coffee maker.  She asked me if I was trying to tell her something.  My immediate response, which I didn’t even think about was, “Not yet.”  She just raised her eyebrows like she does and we both smiled.  (I love my Grammy.)

Less than three weeks later another moment of greatness happened when I discovered I was expecting.  December 18, 2014, will forever be in my memory as I watched Mike bouncing with excitement and yelling across the house for me to come look at the “stick” one more time.  The next day I went to work early so I could go to the doctor. It’s interesting how doubt can still find a way to creep in during moments of excitement.  At the doctor’s office they did their tests and told me I was not pregnant, even though I had already taken three tests by different makers and those tests were all positive.  I was surprised by how depleted of energy I was when the doctor told me I was not going to have a baby at this time.   So… I went home and took four more tests.  They were all positive, but I didn’t really believe I was pregnant until the same office who rained on my parade called to tell me that my blood work came back positive for pregnancy.  Why couldn’t I just believe my heart and the SEVEN home tests I took?  They were wrong and then when they called to tell me what I wanted to hear I believed them. 

Other moments of greatness came in the following week as we got to share with our families and friends the good news.  We were able to video almost every response and I can hardly wait to show those videos at my baby’s first birthday party. 

August 9, 2015, one week before the year mark of when our friend prayed for me, we met with our friend.  We celebrated and took pictures and hugged and laughed about how big my belly had grown.  August 10, the next morning, I got dressed for work and said out loud, “Lord, I’m not sure how many more days I can do this.”  Then I kissed Mike and drove to work.  Sitting at my desk and talking to my co-workers I happened to sneeze… it was time to go.  So Beth picked up her purse and walked me out to the Jeep.  Kaci followed us home and Mike took me from there.  I called the four people on my list, and they called their people to alert our world that A MIRACLE WAS HAPPENING! 

June 21, 2016, is today.  Today is a moment of greatness because I’m curled up on my couch in my living room in the middle of the national forest writing while I listen to my miracle play in his bed because he just woke up.  He slept 12 hours last night, and 18 hours the night before.  He is a miracle every day.  He is my moment of greatness every moment.